Imagination's the limit…

Posts tagged “Funny

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Everybody has that painful experience that occurs in our lives. Some make us, some break us. Yet no matter what, one of life’s greatest beauties are the people around us that ensures that we never have to walk through life alone. Funny… the irony… how your biggest misery could be your biggest joy…

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Edward was feeling down and broken after a failed investment burned some of the hard earned cash he’s made. It wasn’t easy to lose such huge amount. Believe me!

After being able to en-cash his income from a half million deal, he divided his earnings to invest them into different investments he could make at the moment. He was making money work for him. And it did!

jok-burning

However, investments always has risks and at one point, Edward was not spared. One of the investments he’s invested on failed and it burned a whole bunch of cash.

Down-right and depressed… He came to visit his good friend and business partner Clybes.

“Dude! Dude! I just burned my cash! My investment failed and I lost a huge amount of cash!!!” Edward said in panic…

“What the hell man? You sound like you’re excited about it rather than being sad about it.” Clybes being the jolly guy that he is said.

Edward gave out a sarcastic laugh, “It’s funny coz I look as if it were nothing…”

breakup-letter

“Reminds me of the time you got dumped man… You looked like trash one day, then suddenly there you are crazy as fuck, going YOLO and shit!” Clybes gestured in disapproval, “Anyway, why don’t we go to a night club and drink to it, yeah?”

Edward having nothing left to say simply agreed.

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*at the night club*

“Hey dude! Check out the sign!” Edward pointed out at a warning sign posted on the wall.

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“Hmm… It says No Under 18…

“Now what?” Clybes asked, “We’re already here!”

“This is a big problem indeed!”

The both thought about it for a while outside the night club. From intergalactic Trojan horse battleships to Caribbean Pirates and gold. Their thoughts pondered off so far away from reality until….

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“Hey!” Edward excitedly exclaimed, “I’ve got an IDEA!”

“What bro? What is it?”

“Why don’t we just go home?”

“What?!”

“We’re only two people. We should come back when we’ve got 18 or more people with us! Damn I’m a genius!” Edward bragged.

“Alright, sounds logical,” Clybes agreed in content…

And the both went on home…

Dumbass

[END]

Credits go to the rightful owners of the images used in this write-up. Images are used to illustrate scenes described in the write-up and for entertainment purposes only.

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Aside

Here are a few facts…

Here are a few facts that you may not have known?!?

1. If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.

Image(Hardly seems worth it.) -.-

2. If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.

Image                                                                         (Now that’s more like it!) 

3. The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.

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                                                                (O.M.G.!) O_O

4. A pig’s orgasm lasts 30 minutes.

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                                                   (In my next life, I want to be a pig.) 

5. A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death! (Creepy)

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                                               (I’m still not over the pig.)

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6. Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories a hour

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                                             (Don’t try this at home, maybe at work)

7. The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male’s head off.

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                                                  (“Honey, I’m home. What the….?!”)

8. The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It’s like a human jumping the length of a football field.

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                                       (30 minutes..lucky pig! Can you imagine?)

9. The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.

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                                (What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)

10. Some lions mate over 50 times a day.

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                        (I still want to be a pig in my next life…quality over quantity)

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11. Butterflies taste with their feet.

                                          (Something I always wanted to know.)

12. The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.

                                   
                                                        (Hmmmmmm……)

13. Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.

                                        
                               (If you’re ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)

14. Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.

                                     
                                          (okay, so that would be a good thing)

15. A cat’s urine glows under a black light.

                                 
                               (I wonder who was paid to figure that out?)

16. An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain.

                               
                                             (I know some people like that.)

17. Starfish have no brains.

                                         
                                         (I know some people like that too.)

18. Polar bears are left-handed. 

                                  
                                      (If they switch, they’ll live a lot longer)

19. Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.


                                               (What about that pig?? T_T )